Day 30: "Shaped for Serving God"

I just LOVE this chapter! LOVE IT!! Welcome to ALL the readers & thanks for following along as we go through the daily chapters of The Purpose Driven Life: What On Earth Am I Here For? by Pastor Rick Warren.

Today we continue to LEARN more about our own PERSONAL ministry. Today BEGINS the discussion of helping us understand our SHAPE.

I remember as a college student I encountered all kinds of students that had all kinds of different beliefs OR were REALLY confused about their beliefs & I remember being questioned by a classmate of mine...one where I really enjoyed his company & the discussion he brought to our class. See...I used to ALWAYS wear a necklace with a cross on it, not the same one...I had one in EVERY color, BUT he asked me, as we were walking from class..."You don't really believe in that, do you?" He pointed & I asked what he was talking about. He said..."Your cross...I just don't want you to be disappointed one day." I said: "You don't believe in it?!" I was TOTALLY shocked. I had a phone call coming in & I walked to my class & he walked to his. Our next class was quite awkward to say the least. I didn't even know how to talk to him after that. I'd be lying if I didn't confess that he got me to thinkin' about things. I never questioned IF God was real or not, but put myself on a journey to try and really wrap my head around some of the tough things. What I concluded & where I am now is the thinking that: God would not have created us how he created us, if there wasn't some PURPOSE behind it. All these emotions & thoughts & relationships & knowledge & skills & talents & EMOTIONS (I know I said it twice!) just can not be for nothing. Why? How could anyone not acknowledge that part of us? I mean if our jobs, our money, our luxuries were stripped away from us...wouldn't we still have WORTH? Wouldn't we still have EMOTIONS? Wouldn't there still be a PURPOSE for them? That is why I believe that when our physical body dies...it turns to dust, but our DEEP innards...you know our SOULS...don't just disappear. I can't understand it all...only our Maker can & I TRUST & have FAITH that he made us for a purpose, because he sure didn't HAVE to.

Another thing this book has taught me, or made me think about is how God PREPARES for the Plan Bs & Cs & Ds & even Es & Fs & Gs in our life. He has our life mapped out. He KNOWS what our purpose is & he knows how to get us to see it (this chapter teaches you that). He also KNOWS that the devil is going to try and detour us EVERY chance he gets. That's what leads to the Plan Bs & Cs, etc. I think about when I REALLY make a plan for something...I mean REALLY put everything into it & do the research (no shortcuts) & KNOW what things could POSSIBLY come at me. There is no way of me knowing if they will, but it is the BEST way I can PREPARE myself to be prepared to COMBAT it. When you study like this...you LEARN your competition (just an example) or your drawback. Many times you become SO educated about it...you could teach a class on it. That is how God is with the devil...at least that is what I believe. First of all he created his being...he knows how he operates. Secondly, he has been dealin' with him for SO LONG that he knows the kind of tricks & kniving schemes he will try and put into play. He knows what member of his army, he'll send after you. God has a counter for EVERY trick the devil can throw at us. Earlier in the book we learned that there are some situations where the SPECIFIC job you're in is not the IMPORTANT part in God's overall plan. For example....You could have offers from 3 different companies, but all 3 of those companies will allow God to develop the skills he wants to develop in you. The specific job you choose is kind of irrelevant in the grand scheme of things. God knows several ways to keep you on your journey to learning & SHARING your purpose.

We are going to start to learn about our SHAPE!! This was REALLY eye-opening to me.

S-Spiritual Gifts
H-Heart
A-Abilities
P-Personality
E-Experience

Today we will learn about our Spiritual Gifts & our Heart, but first I just want to share something. It USED to be REALLY hard for me to understand people who didn't think like I did...and honestly I just couldn't figure out a way to understand their way of thinking. I used to think they were just WRONG and that was it. As I got older...I realized that EVERY person has REASONS for thinking they way they think, or emotions that hang them up on things, or DIffErent experiences that cause them to see things in a different light. This chapter really drives home how we are ALL created COMPLETELY UNIQUELY. Every one of us has a different mixture of the "SHAPE" recipe that makes us uniqUe.

SPIRITUAL GIFTS: "These are special God-empowered abilities for serving him that are given only to believers." How SPECIAL is that?! This chapter goes on to tell us how all of our gifts our different & how our gifts actually help others, just like the gifts of others are meant to help us. God keeps us NEEDING each other! This is a REALLY important part from this chapter: "Two common problems are 'gift-envy' & 'gift-projection.' The first occurs when we compare our gifts with others', feel dissatisfied with what God gave us, and become resentful or jealous of how God uses others. The second problem happens when we expect everyone else to have our gifts, do what we are called to do, and feel as passionate about it as we do." My experience of not understanding others is shown in the second problem. We ALL experience things, but the more AWARE of the problems you become...the quicker you can PUMP THE BRAKES on them.

HEART: "The Bible uses the term heart to describe the bundle of desire, hopes, interests, ambitions, dreams, and affections you have. Your heart represents the source of all your motivations - what you love to do and what you care about most." What Pastor Warren goes on to discuss in this section is SO good. It makes me think of this internal struGgLe I've been having with myself about what direction I should go with my auction business. Let me tell you...there are ALL kinds of auctions...ALL KINDS & sometimes it is hard to know what direction you are meant to go/supposed to go/which one is an opportunity/which way is a diversion.... I've been guided to & from several different ones including: general consignment auctions, benefit/fundraising auctions, & estate auctions. I've learned a lot in the last couple months & have gotten some of the BEST ADVICE from some of the BEST in the industry, that has provided some clarity to me. Here is what I have learned, b/c (BEFORE the convention) I have gone in the WRONG direction (for me) based on the advice of others....others that I fully respect. Just because someone can see ALL the reasons that a certain business direction will work GREAT for you...does not mean that YOU can see how that business direction will work for you. YOU have to know & you have to WANT to do it. I had been guided away from the direction I want to go...because others in my field didn't necessarily see things how I saw it & THEY had experienced certain difficulties that made them want to deter me from that road. There are some areas of this industry that I truly don't know if I'd like or not. There's only one way to figure that out...go & do it. Just because I learn about an area I'm NOT familiar with, DOES NOT mean that I can't grow MY business in the direction that I KNOW I CAN. You can be an ASSET to your company...at the same time you are an ASSET to another. It all depends on your HEART...Do you have a DESIRE? Do you HOPE to grow from the experience? Are you INTERSTed in it? Do you have the AMBITION to go after it? Do you DREAM to be well-rounded in your trade?

I'm gonna share 4 more quotes from the book that really say it all for me:

"Your emotional heartbeat is the second key to understanding your shape for service. DON'T IGNORE YOUR INTERESTS."

"How do you know when you are serving God from your heart? The first telltale sign is enthusiasm."

**Side note on this one. That year when I did VERY few auctions & I called the Ledbetter Fireman's Auction in October...I got in the car with my Uncle & his girlfriend & said: "This is what I'm SUPPOSED to be doing! I just NEED to figure it out. I'm not sure HOW I'm gonna make a living at it, but this is what I'm supposed to be doing."

"When you don't have a heart for what you're doing, you are easily discouraged."

**A PERFECT example of this for me is the JOY I get when doing a benefit auction vs. a consignment auction.

"Whenever you do what God wired you to love to do, you get good at it. Passion drives perfection."

"Point to Ponder: I was shaped for serving God."

Daily Bible Verse: "God works through different men in different ways, but it is the same God who achieves his purposes through them all." 1 Corinthians 12:6 (PH)

Daily Question: "In what way can I see myself passionately serving others and loving it?"

From my journal the first time of reading: Auctions, fundraising, raising money for people and causes, event planning and coordination, spreading God's word to the masses, playing with children and teaching them.

Buck Up Baby & Ride With Jesus!! If you haven't yet...GO GET THIS BOOK!!

God Bless!
Heather Schoenst Kaspar
TXL 17037

Day 27: "Defeating Temptation"

Welcome back!! Today we move on to Day 27 in Pastor Rick Warren's book: The Purpose Driven Life: What On Earth Am I Here For?

Today we talk about defeating temptation. We are TEMPTED...sometimes it feels like...EVERY minute of EVERY day. Tempted by something...negative thoughts, the thoughts of others, perceptions, things we love, pleasure, worry, time frames, deadlines, confusion.... I know now that it is ALL about the choices we make...the perseverance we have, the clarity of mind, the knowledge of scripture, being surrounded by those that SUPPORT you, SUPPORTING others on their journey, PRAYING...

Sometimes I get SO muddied up it is ridiculous! This book says: "Spiritually, your mind is your most vulnerable organ." It also says: "The battle for sin is won or lost in your mind." Pastor Warren ain't joshin'! Sometimes I think the SOLUTION for EVERYTHING is so stinkin' simple, but we can't handle simple anymore. I think of all the issues or problems or concerns or mess-ups that I've experienced & if I'd have just STOPPED & THOUGHT before acting or initiating or saying or doing....I'd have FIXED my own problem....simply with CLARITY of my own KNOWLEDGE. One thing that I can get caught up with is listening to what OTHER people think I should be doing. It is a process, but just the simple fact that I am AWARE of it, has helped me to GROW out of it. Don't get me wrong...I still struGglE with it....because I know that I don't know everything & I know I need HELP...but GOD has ENTRUSTED me with the skills & knowledge that I have to make MY OWN decisions, but still use the advice, success, and experience of others to help me form them.

Where is your attention? I have EVOLVED in just the short time of reading this book for the first time & now re-reading and sharing with you all. I've evolved because of what I've learned, my experiences & where my attention is. Pastor Warren says: "Whatever gets your attention will get you."

I think of my ANXIETY levels now...compared to what they used to be. What amazes me, as I look back, is I know where my attention is. My attention is protecting, providing, developing, & strengthening what GOD has BLESSED me with. That includes my gifts, my talent, my marriage, my children, my work ethic, my friendships, my TRUST in God and everything he has blessed me with & REVEALED to me....  If you had asked me that when I read this book the first time...my answer PROBABLY would have been FIGURING OUT A WAY to provide for my family and to succeed. The difference in the two answers is what I probably would have said the first time around is self-serving & me goin' it on my own. Where my attention is now gives it ALL to GOD...the success, the way those gifts prosper, the way my talent develops, the way my marriage and friendships strengthen, the way my sweet baby girl talks about Jesus, the way I'm able to share God's message to others, the way I allow others to help me by their experiences...even the failures go to Him...because I know I'm learning a lesson that will allow me to be BLESSED once I get through it.

I URGE everyone of you reading & whoever you will share this with to start learning God's word. However it works best for you. The book encourages a Bible Verse a week. I PRAY that you all become aware that OUR MIND can work for us or against us, BUT it is OUR CHOICE. I URGE you to find a friend that you can talk to about Jesus things....about questions you have...about the flaws you possess....about your experiences and what you think they might mean...AND I URGE you to ACCEPT the FACT that you are MUCH less powerful on your own....MUCH less. ACCEPT the FACT that you NEED God....all the time.

On the first page of this chapter it says: "It may surprise you that nowhere in the Bible are we told to 'resist temptation.' We are told to 'resist the devil.'" Buck Up Baby & Ride With Jesus! Don't let the devil use your own thoughts against you.... I know it's easier said than done. Being aware of it is the BEGINNING of DEFEATING it.

"Point to Ponder: There is always a way out."

Daily Bible Verse: "God is faithful. He will keep the temptation from becoming so strong that you can't stand up against it. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you will not give in to it."
 -1 Corinthians 10:13B (NLT)

Daily Question: "Who could I ask to be a spiritual partner to help me defeat a persistent temptation by praying for me?"

From my journal the first time of reading (Now you know ladies ;):

Embracing JOY & kindness - Kaysie Noska
Patience & Self-Control - Christina Pace

Day 26: "Growing Through Tempation"

Well...I'm back from the WONDERFUL Frio River. REALLY...I LOVE that place. Thanks to all you readers that are hangin' in there with me & WELCOME to all the new readers.

Today's discussion topic from the book: The Purpose Driven Life: What On Earth Am I Here For? by Pastor Rick Warren is about growING through temptation.

I can not reiterate enough how life-CHANGING this book can be....really. This chapter is chalked FULL of advice & explanations & processes & tools that I'm sure we have ALL searched for. I'm again...going to speak from MY experience....how applying lessons from this chapter have helped me & maybe show some progress from the first time of reading to the second.

What I take away from this chapter is we have a CHOICE...we ALWAYS have a choice & we ALWAYS will. Every situation....every experience....every temptation is an OPPORTUNITY to make the BEST choice, but it is ours to make. What I also take away is just how BEAUTIFUL God's gift of The Holy Spirit is to us.... & how that relationship is....kind of like our lifeblood...mine at least. You know...what REALLY gives you purpose...what guides you...what creates your distinction between right and wrong...what grounds you...what calms you...what nourishes you...what is your life line straight to God.

So...I have a couple stories to share.... One is of my relationship with The Holy Spirit... The other is an example of temptation & what I THINK was the devil trying to tempt me & me winning a victory for God.

The book says this: "When the Holy Spirit controls our lives, he will produce this kind of fruit in us: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control." Pastor Warren took that from Galatians 5:22-23(NLT).

I had a situation happen a few weeks ago that I am hesitant to share, but...well...words aren't going to do it justice & some people really may not understand it....and some may advise against sharing it, but I feel like it happened for a reason & it's not meant to be a secret. So....a few weeks ago, I was driving in my little home town & I passed the cemetery. The cemetery where most everyone from my Dad's side of the family are buried. I was EXTREMELY close to my Grandma Schoenst...as were my siblings & she used to make it a point to go & put flowers on all of the graves at the cemetery.

I think it's important that you have a little back story. I used to work at a daycare in my hometown & every day or every other day I would stop by and visit with my Grandma. Later I had gotten a job at a bank. I didn't stop by near as often. It went from once a week to once every two weeks, etc. Well...to be EXTREMELY blunt about the situation...I was a young, selfish kid that just didn't REALLY get the importance of that time I spent with her & how much it probably meant to her. I beat myself up about it for years. The older I got & the more I developed my understanding of things I just liked myself less and less about the situation. I remember by first face-to -face confession I asked for forgiveness for this and the priest looked at me & said: "That is not a sin. Why are you asking me to forgive it?" & my response was: "Because I was a SO selfish. I mean I LOVED her so much & she loved us UNCONDITIONALLY and I didn't even have enough decency to HONOR that." He bowed his head and told me that I need to find a way to forgive myself. Whew....I had NO CLUE what that meant at the time or how to go about it.

So now back to the story... I drove past the cemetery and, mind you, it had rained quite a bit, so there was water standing EVERYWHERE, but I felt COMPELLED to turn around. I don't know how else to explain it. I really didn't even give it much more thought. I just turned around & went back to the cemetery. I went to the first row of graves where some of our family members are buried. Then I made my way to the last row where my Grandma & Grandpa are buried. I got about two graves away from my Grandma's & was literally OVERCOME. I looked up to Heaven & said "God, I don't know what you're doin,' but just give me the strength to handle it." I sat Indian-style on her grave, because water was literally standing everywhere. I even pulled out my phone thinking: "I'm going to Google a 'special' prayer for her." Then it struck me that I didn't need to Google anything. I had it all within me. I put my hands on her grave & just started talking to her about everyone & my sweet babies...catchin' up talk... & then...my friend calls me. I silence it b/c I'm praying & talking to my Grandma & then I just started pouring out ALL the pent up feelings and emotions I had about myself & how I handled the last period of time we were on earth together & asking her to FORGIVE me & telling her how IMPORTANT she is to me & how she DESERVED better. It felt like 1000 pounds was lifted off my chest & then...without even thinking twice about it....I said these words: " Grandma, I don't know what kind of job God has for you up in Heaven, but if it's His will....there is a girl between here & Heaven & she needs you & Jesus & God & The Holy Spirit & whatever angels you can bring with you to pull her up." Another tidbit of info that is important (& what I thought many people may not understand) is that the friend that called me, had just lost the family member I was praying about, in a TRAGIC gas explosion that left her young baby & husband ALIVE.

As I call her back & check in with her...she asks me if I would say a prayer for the girl I JUST prayed for. NOW...I KNOW what some of you may be thinking.... I know because it is the VERY reason I hesitated with sharing this & was left in COMPLETE AWE... We are SO intertwined with each other on a DEEP SPIRITUAL level....that it is truly BEYOND our understanding. She had NO idea I was at the cemetery. She had NO knowledge of my relationship with my Grandma. She didn't even REALLY know the full story behind the explosion. I'm not even going to begin to try and understand the why behind all of that.

I shared this story with a priest & I have to say....he HELPED me to UNDERSTAND the CAPACITY of what had happened. He said....that the COMPELLING feeling I felt was not a coincidence. It was The Holy Spirit moving me & I listened. When I spoke those words to my Grandma I broke the bounds I placed on myself, but MORE IMPORTANTLY, let my Grandmother's soul rise to be with the angels & she took that sweet young mother's soul with her. He told me to read the book: Anatomy of Spirit.

I can't make you feel what I felt & I can't make you believe what I'm typing. Just spend some time thinking about things.

TEMPTATION is brought to us by the devil. He wants to tie us up. He wants to warp our minds. He wants to do WHATEVER it takes to keep us from Heaven. It opened my eyes to see how important we still are to each other & what the first priest meant by: "finding a way to forgive myself." ALL that negative emotion was NOT a product of God.

I know that is A LOT to take in, but I also want to share one more story...a VERY recent one...on how (I think) the devil was trying to tempt me & (although I couldn't hold back ALL of the emotions) I won one for God.

My husband & I got into an argument. I was some kind of ticked off. I kept trying to ignore it...just deal with it...channel the energy & the thoughts, control myself, be nice & good &graceful & all that jazz, BUT I just couldn't...not say something. When I say I tried....I REALLY did. I went & sat in the bathroom. Just sat there mad. Mad that I was mad. Mad that I said something. Mad that he didn't understand what I was saying to him. MAD. I said a short prayer to God saying: "God, I don't know what your settin' up here & I don't want to give the enemy any ground, but I already said what I said & I meant it. Just help me speak in a way that my husband will TRULY hear me on EVERY level I need to be heard & take care of us." Well...I'm not tellin' you what I said to him because it was kind of vulgar, but he HEARD me. My point to that story is....we will do things that aren't right...might be right, but don't seem right to anyone else... may be WAY OFF in left field...BUT GOD CAN TURN IT. He took that situation that was full of all kind of negative emotions & turned it into a way I could communicate to him to where BOTH of our eyes could be opened...to understand each other.

We aren't perfect & weren't made to be. We will be TEMPTED continuously for the rest of our lives, but we have to learn to grOW through the temptation to develop the character of Jesus. We aren't expected to be perfect & Jesus shares our struggles because he knows the intensity of temptation.

"Point to Ponder: Every temptation is an opportunity to do good."

Daily Bible Verse: "God blesses the people who patiently endure testing. Afterward they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him." James 1:12 (NLT)

Daily Question: "What Christ-like character quality can I develop by defeating the most common temptation I face?"

From my journal the first time around: I feel like I have lots of things to work on in areas of temptation. I think the main two areas I need to focus on are endurance and moving forward and to not give up - because I do feel like I've been tempted persistently in these departments.

The other is dishonesty...mainly in small situations like where I am EXACTLY (like when I'm running late) or areas where I don't want to hurt someone. I really need to practice complete and utter honesty, but THINK first.

JOY- I feel like I kind of stay a sour puss. I wasn't always like that. I think because I am around negativity and judgement and confusion. God PLEASE help me find joy in everything!!

I have to report my progress :)....don't expect GIVE-UP any time soon. God just LOVES me & sends me people, places, and experiences to fill in all those gaps where the thoughts of give-up tried to live. HONESTY is totally on the forefront....You are fore-warned. If you don't REALLY want to know...don't ask me. JOY....well...I still got a little ways to go with that, BUT I'm on that road. It's amazing when you cut out some of that negativity, judgement, & confusion how much more room you have for JOY.

Buck Up Baby & Ride with Jesus!! He was tempted JUST like us...but had the strength to endure it all.